By Fẹ́mi Akínṣọlá
Valentine’s Day, often celebrated as a hallmark of love and affection, has morphed into an occasion that many Nigerian youths misinterpret, leading to troubling behaviours that undermine the essence of genuine connection. While the day can be viewed as an opportunity to express romantic sentiments and foster relationships, it frequently encourages a culture of excess and moral decay. The idealised representations of love, amplified by social media and peer pressure, set unrealistic expectations and result in a troubling fixation on alcohol, promiscuity, and related immoral behaviours. Therefore, it is vital to critically evaluate how this particular day has transformed into a catalyst for these detrimental trends among Nigerian youth and adults.
One immediate consequence of this misinterpretation is the overwhelming association of Valentine’s Day with reckless partying and alcohol consumption. Urban centres often see excessive drinking on this day, where individuals feel compelled to engage in hedonistic pursuits. This behaviour poses significant health risks, such as alcohol poisoning and sexually transmitted infections (STIs). While some might argue that this is a celebration of youth and freedom, the reality is that the blurred lines between enjoyment and irresponsibility can lead to dangerous situations, including impaired driving and sexual misconduct. As both youths and adults indulge in toxic celebrations, they risk losing the capacity to discern between meaningful connections and fleeting encounters, distorting their understanding of love and companionship.
In contrast to these troubling behaviours, traditional marriage ceremonies in Nigeria celebrate love through rich cultural rituals that focus on respect, commitment, and the blending of families. Such ceremonies serve as significant reminders of the enduring bonds that form the true essence of love. Similarly, the Yam Festival (Ibo Ukwu), celebrated by various ethnic groups, honours the new yam harvest and emphasises community and family love through sharing and abundance. This festival beautifully illustrates the importance of unity and connection, which starkly contrasts with the often-solitary celebrations seen on Valentine’s Day.
Furthermore, the pervasive culture of casual sex that often accompanies Valentine’s Day risks eroding essential values of respect and commitment. Many young individuals, in an effort to conform to societal expectations, may engage in sexual activities as a misguided measure of maturity. This dynamic creates a cycle where superficial interactions overshadow the true essence of intimacy and emotional connection. Adults, too, may succumb to these temptations, using the day as an excuse for infidelity under the guise of a romantic celebration. Such behaviours not only harm personal relationships but can also set a poor precedent for younger generations, normalising irresponsible decisions about love and intimacy.
The commercialisation of Valentine’s Day exacerbates these issues, as advertisements propagate the idea that love can be demonstrated through extravagant spending. This creates an unhealthy link between materialism and affection, perpetuating the belief that worth is tied to societal performances of love. Many youths and adults feel compelled to spend beyond their means, leading to financial strain and promoting irresponsible financial behaviours. While some argue that the day fosters generosity and expressions of love, it can equally lead to destructive cycles of debt and regret, undermining true affection in the process.
Moreover, the emphasis on social media portrayals of Valentine’s Day can ignite feelings of inadequacy regardless of age. Individuals, feeling the pressure to showcase their romantic encounters online, may fall into the trap of comparing their experiences with the idealised versions presented by others. This can foster jealousy and dissatisfaction, leading many to question their self-worth and the authenticity of their relationships. For adults, the need for validation can result in competitive displays of affection that detract from genuine connection, further complicating the emotional landscape of love.
Additionally, the indulgence in illicit behaviours during Valentine’s festivities can lead to legal issues, as parties can quickly escalate. Instances of public drunkenness, violence, and drug-related incidents not only tarnish reputations but can also lead to significant legal consequences, such as fines or community service. These repercussions can extend beyond individuals, affecting family dynamics and community relationships, thereby illuminating the broader impact of such behaviours.
To mitigate these negative trends, several societal changes are essential. First, promoting education around healthy relationships and the importance of consent in schools can empower both youth and adults to engage in more meaningful connections. Awareness campaigns that emphasise emotional intelligence and set realistic expectations about love can shift the focus from commercialised ideals to genuine relationship-building.
Second, fostering open dialogues within families about love, relationships, and the pressures surrounding Valentine’s Day can empower individuals to express their feelings more authentically. Community initiatives, such as workshops or public discussions, can reinforce the notion that love is about mutual respect, understanding, and shared values rather than extravagant displays. Celebrations like the Ọ̀ṣun-Òṣogbo Festival, which emphasises community bonding and cultural heritage, and the Ẹ̀yọ̀ Festival, a tribute that strengthens community ties, illustrate how love can be celebrated through shared cultural experiences.
Moreover, local governments could consider implementing policies to manage public celebrations responsibly, ensuring that events promote safety and well-being for all participants.
In conclusion, while Valentine’s Day can be celebrated as a joyful occasion for expressing love, its implications for Nigerian youth and adults warrant serious consideration. By striking a balance between acknowledging the positive aspects of celebration and critically assessing its potential consequences, we can work towards a more meaningful understanding of affection. By promoting responsible approaches to love and connection—prioritising genuine interactions over commercialised festivities—and embracing cultural celebrations that emphasise authentic connections, we can mitigate the negative impacts of Valentine’s Day. Ultimately, love should be recognised as a profound and meaningful connection, fostering a culture that values true intimacy and respect across all relationships.
Photo: Illustration photo from the file.
Copyright © 2026 Fẹ́mi Akínṣọlá. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author.
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